We here at GuySpy loved Gay Pride parties, and gosh did we hit some good ones. But one event made our Private Eye list for being so gosh darn bad. It was a big to-do with a big admission price, so let’s hit some basics of what went wrong.

"Did you here? Everyone's left for Splash!"

Bar None: Well, they had an open bar till ten, but that only included specialty drinks, which tasted like watered down watermelon seeds. If you wanted a real drink, it was 15 bucks and up. Open bars till ten aren’t that hot anyway, since no one but the catering crew shows up before then.

Food for Thought: And where was that catering crew? There are two rules of a good party: food and drink. You gotta give the boys (and too many straight girls) something to chew on, even if it’s chips and dip. Nada.

It’s My B-Day Song … Not! As soon as you walked into the event, you ran into a private birthday party … literally. The chairs and food (they had food!) were directly opposite the entrance, so you were an automatic intruder in a small space. We should know; the birthday boy kicked us out of his reserved seats … we assumed they were “free” seating. Someone should be spanked for that scheduling maneuver.

Rainy Days and Fridays: It was pouring outside the event, but no place to keep dry while you waited in line. (Flashing press credentials didn’t get you cuts.) Once inside, there was no coat check (yes, you need them in warm weather in case, oh, it rains!), so you had to lug around your wet umbrellas with you, or anything else you happened to bring along with you—one of us came from the gym and was forced to carry a gym bag around all evening.

Pride, in the Name Of… So, this being a to-do event with press invited to cover all the fabulousness, what did guests get? No food, no drink passes, no places to stash our stash, and no birthday cake! There was a beautiful view of the New York skyline, which, in itself, is like going to a party that only offers up gorgeous guys, who think their beauty alone is all a good party needs. Been there…