Brad Pitt Dismissed From Jury Duty for Being Too Brad Pitty

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December 21, 2014
6:00 a.m.

brad-pitt-ruined-shirtless-scenes-jokes-charlie-hunnam-02Story Courtesy Of Kelly Conaboy

Would you convict someone of a crime you don’t believe they committed, simply because Brad Pitt—handsome Brad Pitt—wished to see them behind bars (for his own reasons, we don’t need to pry)? Yes. And that is why Brad Pitt cannot serve on a jury.

The Daily Mail reports that Brad Pitt was ready to serve as a juror in LA—had his little juror lunch packed, had his little juror outfit on, etc., I assume—when his civic duty was stolen right from his little celebrity hands. Rude! LA attorney William Lively spoke to the Daily Mail about why, why, whyyyeeee:

“You just can’t stick Brad Pitt in a jury box and expect 11 jurors to ignore him. It’s only natural that those jurors would be watching to see how Brad reacts to what’s being said and that they could be influenced by his opinions once the jury goes behind closed doors to render a verdict.”

A few examples of possible holes other jurors could’ve fallen into:

  • “I say what Brad just said.”
  • “Brad Pitt and I have a lot of things in common, haha, and it’s so weird but one of them is the verdict in this case.”
  • “Me too, what Brad thinks.”
  • “Juror brothers!”

Us Weekly also spoke to William Lively about this thing:

Lively adds to Us Weekly that “too much attention” on one juror could “interfere with the objective examination of the allegations” in the case. “It’s one of those things where [it’s like], ‘We’re not going to use you because it’s going to end up being about you,'” he says.

BRAD PITT DID IT I MEAN AHHHHHH HI BRAD PITT, HE DID IT! I MEAN NO AHHH BRAD!

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